


The Nanny and The Gardener

by chimeradragon



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Canon Compliant, Dual Genders, F/M, I Don't Even Know, If You Squint - Freeform, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Intersex, M/M, intersex!Aziraphale, intersex!Crowley, just an excuse for porn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 13:33:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19252219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chimeradragon/pseuds/chimeradragon
Summary: I don't know where this came from. But the bunny bit me and this is what happened. Hope you enjoy a bit of intersex!smut between our Ineffable!Husbands!





	The Nanny and The Gardener

**Author's Note:**

> If anyone is offended by the use of the word "hermaphrodite" previously used in the tags know that I have never heard of that word as being offensive to anyone before. Nor have I ever heard it used in a derogatory way. And I humbly apologize for any offense as that was not my intention. It's the only word I'd ever heard used for someone of both genders. I have adjusted the tags to reflect the word 'intersex' but I know a lot of people are unfamiliar with that word so to avoid confusion I'm notating both here. I have also edited the summary. Thank you for reading. I truly hope you enjoy what I've made.

"You're the boy's Nanny?" Aziraphale asked with an incredulous look on his face. He looked over the body of Crowley and noted there were subtle changes the other had made. "You changed... everything?"

 

"Not really," Crowley replied as he raised an eyebrow. "Everything's functional, just added a bit to the chest. 

 

"Really?" Aziraphale asked as the thought of getting to have Crowley like this, more feminine, seemed to ignite his loins. 

 

"You wanna see?" Crowley asked as he pushed Aziraphale into a nearby chair. He straddled the blonde and reached down to unzip the other's trousers. Crowley reached into Aziraphale's trousers and pulled the rapidly hardening flesh into his hands, then did something complicated with his hand before sinking down onto Aziraphale's length with a soft moan of pleasure. "Haven't used that in a while... feel's good." 

 

"Better than good," Aziraphale agreed as he made a small, rolling thrust with his hips. He felt the hands on his shoulders as he looked up to see Crowley with his eyes closed while the demons shifted minutely to find the perfect angle. The angel could feel the demon's answering hardness even as he was wrapped in tight, slick heat. "Always forget you're both. Somehow, I forget demons aren't all single gendered." 

 

"You mean just like most angels are sexless, but not all of them?" Crowley asked with a smirk. He knew the secret Aziraphale hid in his own trousers. One that made other angels uncomfortable. Most demons thought Crowley was just an Alpha male with feminine features while most assumed Aziraphale was a genderless robot for Heaven. They both had discovered early on that they shared an oddity in their corporations. "Maybe I'll bend you over the bed later and remind you of your own situation." 

 

Aziraphale shuddered as he felt Crowley start to shove harder, seeking his own release by using the angel for his own pleasure. Suddenly Crowley froze with a shiver as the doorknob rattled before turning to reveal Warlock.

 

"Y-yesss, dear?" Crowley managed even as he shivered from the stimulation and his hiss was only slightly noticeable. His hands spasmmed from their place on Aziraphale's shoulders. 

 

"Will you sing me a lullaby, Nanny Ashtoreth? I can't sleep," Warlock said as he stood in the doorway and rubbed his eyes, a stuffed animal in one hand. 

 

"Sure thing, dear," Crowley replied as he shifted unconsciously and made both immortals shiver. "Go get a drink and hop in your bed. I'll be right along dear." 

 

"Okay. And Nanny Ashtoreth?" 

 

"Yes dear?" Crowley asked as his whole body clenched and made Aziraphale shiver while hi own body throbbed. 

 

"I love you, you're the best," Warlock stated as he moved close to hug Crowley around the wast before hugging Aziraphale. "You too, Brother Francis. Night!" 

 

Crowley shuddered as the door slammed shut behind Warlock and he managed to relax his body and felt Aziraphale twitch inside of him. "Oh, we've got to do this more often... if only so he doesn't think this is weird. Too close for comfort."

 

"Let me help you there, Ashtoreth," Aziraphale offered as he held Crowley's hips and pounded into the body above him, unrelentingly aiming for the other's G-spot. 

 

"Zira!" Crowley cried out as he came, spasming around the shaft inside of him as his womanhood clenched and shivered, bringing Aziraphale over the edge with him. "So ... perfect."

 

Aziraphale mouthed at Crowley's neck gently as he nosed behind the other's ear an into his long red hair while they came down from their orgasms together. "I believe that's my line, dear one." 

 

"Next time," Crowley promised. 

 

"I'm looking forward to it," Aziraphale replied as he half-dozed a moment before Crowley stood and whined when Aziraphale's length slipped free. "Good night, ma'am." 

 

Crowley straightened his skirts and shivered at the feeling of Aziraphale's release slowly dripping down his legs while his own mess was smeared into the under skirt. 

 

&*&*&

 

In the garden... 

 

Aziraphale was on his hands and knees in the garden, dirt up to his elbows while he worked on weeding the old fashioned way. The sun overhead was warm but the hedge he was buried in next to the wall offered enough shade to keep it from being oppressive. 

 

"My, my, what have we here?" a familiar Scottish accent rang out. 

 

"Jus' a bit o' gard'ning, ma'am," Aziraphale replied without removing himself from the hedge. 

 

"You know, the young master and his dame are away for the day," Crowley replied, voice lower and less breathy. "It's just the two of us until supper." 

 

"Sounds peaceful," Aziraphale replied as he let the heavy cockney accent fade. 

 

"Sounds like opportunity to me," Crowley replied as he kicked at Aziraphale's feet with his heels and forced the kneeling angel's legs to spread. He quickly knelt in the opening he'd provided and and leaned forward to run a hand up the other's backside. "A good one from the looks of it." 

 

Aziraphale bit his lip as he felt the possessive way the hand moved up to where his wings would be if they were manifested and shivered at the thought of the other touching is wings in such a sexual way. "Indeed."

 

Crowley grinned as he looked around just to make doubly sure there was no one around before he lifted his skirts to cover Aziraphale's backside and for him draw close. He snapped his fingers and Aziraphale's trousers were around his knees along with his pants. He groaned as those wickedly clever fingers found Aziraphale's damp folds and started stroking, ignoring his growing erection. 

 

"Such a wet pussy for me," Crowley purred as he dipped his fingers inside of the angel's wetness. "think you're we enough, fore me."

 

"Such language," Aziraphale tried to chastise but the moan at the end ruined the effect when Crowley spread the fingers inside of the angel. Aziraphale felt himself tighten as his G-Spot was struck by those clever fingers and he rocked back into the motion inside of him, begging for more without words. 

 

"Hm, seems like your body doesn't care about the language I use," Crowley teased as he pulled his fingers free and pressed against the other before he could protest. "Shall I show you how to properly plow a garden?" the tone was playful but there was a fine tremble in the hands at Aziraphale's waist. 

 

"Please..." Aziraphale managed to breathe. His whole body arched as Crowley breached him slowly, but didn't stop until he was buried to the hilt inside. 

 

"Your quim trembles for me," Crowley murmured with a smirk as he gave tiny, shallow thrusts, enjoying the feeling of the other starting to fall apart around him. He grinned to himself as he continued to strike the perfect angle, quickly bringing the two of them off in record time. 

 

"C-Crow... ley!" Aziraphale gasped as he came on the ground and shivered around the hard length inside him. He gave another shiver when he felt the way the cock inside of him twitched, releasing Crowley's seed inside of him. 

 

"Angel... Aziraphale..." Crowley breathed as he slumped forward, body still twitching. "You know... I think I'll be looking forward to more of this ... stress relief in the future."

 

"Happy to oblige, ma'am," Aziraphale replied playfully as he smiled into the dirt. He gave a soft whine when the other stood and puled free. There was a protest on the angel's lips when he felt his trousers and pants miracled back into place. 

 

"Young Master Warlock," Crowley greeted, soft Scottish accent back in place. "You have such fascinating timing. Good to have you back. Should we continue our lessons?"

 

"Sure thing, Nanny!" Warlock called enthusiastically. 

 

"I'll see you later, Brother Francis," Crowley promised lowly as he strode off. 

 

Aziraphale shivered in the warmth from the sun as he pulled himself back together. His mind drifted to how much he was really enjoying their Arrangement. 

 

END.


End file.
